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reminds me of the time i was staffas
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  No. 306925 [PM] [Reply]

Well, anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

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  No. 306402 [PM] [Reply]

Man, some people just can't take a joke, you know?
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  No. 306640 [PM]

Except that I had to sit between two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor

  No. 306677 [PM]

"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again

  No. 306752 [PM]

Well, that's just great

  No. 306889 [PM]

But just to be funny, I took a big bite out of his jugular vein

  No. 306926 [PM]

You know, just completely missing the irony of the whole situation


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  No. 306380 [PM] [Reply]

And anyone on the street will gladly shave your back for a nickel

  No. 306857 [PM]

That snorkel's been just like a snorkel to me"

  No. 306923 [PM]

So anyway, he bursts into my room and he grabs my lucky snorkel


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  No. 306657 [PM] [Reply]

Well, anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

  No. 306715 [PM]

And he's like, "Tough"

  No. 306917 [PM]

And I'm like, "Hey, you can't have that


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  No. 306912 [PM] [Reply]

Well, anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

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  No. 306911 [PM] [Reply]

Well, to cut a long story short, he got away with my snorkel

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  No. 306910 [PM] [Reply]

I said, "Well, in that case - in that case, what do you have?"

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  No. 306904 [PM] [Reply]

I said, "You got any cinnamon rolls?"

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  No. 306587 [PM] [Reply]

You know why?

  No. 306626 [PM]

And I walked on up to the guy behind the counter

  No. 306643 [PM]

I said, "Whoa, hold on now, baby, I'm just not ready for that kind of a commitment"

  No. 306906 [PM]

Aw, we ate together, we bathed together


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  No. 306585 [PM] [Reply]

So anyway, he bursts into my room and he grabs my lucky snorkel

  No. 306757 [PM]

And my lucky, lucky autographed glow-in-the-dark snorkel

  No. 306899 [PM]

If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"


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  No. 306362 [PM] [Reply]

She just looked at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train

  No. 306638 [PM]

And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over

  No. 306686 [PM]

That's right, I got me a part-time job at the Sizzler

  No. 306698 [PM]

And wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence

  No. 306713 [PM]

Someday I would get outta that basement and travel to a magical, far away place

  No. 306894 [PM]

And the little kid in back of me kept throwin' up the whole time


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  No. 306365 [PM] [Reply]

There's no answer

  No. 306579 [PM]

You might also like

  No. 306891 [PM]

Aw, we ate together, we bathed together


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  No. 306709 [PM] [Reply]

And, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out

  No. 306828 [PM]

That's when I knew it was true love

  No. 306871 [PM]

I would not sleep for an instant until the one-nostrilled man was brought to justice

  No. 306890 [PM]

I said, "Whoa, hold on now, baby, I'm just not ready for that kind of a commitment"


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  No. 306634 [PM] [Reply]

And my seat back in the full upright position

  No. 306685 [PM]

Draggin' along my big leather suitcase and my garment bag

  No. 306718 [PM]

"Who is it?"

  No. 306745 [PM]

I said, "You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"

  No. 306805 [PM]

I said, "Hey, Mom, what's up with all the sauerkraut?"

  No. 306886 [PM]

And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over


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  No. 306885 [PM] [Reply]

Kinda lost my train of thought

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