No. 301287 [PM]
This thread was kinda funny
No. 301288 [PM]
The video is titled “I Review Jamie Oliver’s Cafe! MISLEADING & DISAPPOINTING!” and comes from the channel Gary Eats (run by an English guy who eats at restaurants and rates them without sugarcoating things; he has nearly half a million subscribers).
It’s a live food review, vlog-style: the guy heads to Oxford Street in London, walks into John Lewis (that fancy department store), and goes up to the third floor to try Jamie Oliver’s Café, which is right next to the famous chef’s own Cookery School.
Gary starts by walking along Oxford Street, checking out the John Lewis sales (up to 50% off), but he isn't there to shop, he’s there to eat. He heads up to the third floor (“outdoor living”) and comes across Jamie Oliver’s café. He mentions that online, they promised homemade quiches, sausage rolls, homemade tomato soup, and toasties (toasted sandwiches).
He arrives around 1:00 or 2:00 PM (lunchtime), and surprise, surprise, they’ve run out of almost all the good stuff:
• No ham & cheese toastie.
• No sausage rolls.
• No quiche.
• No celery salad.
He’s left looking completely unimpressed. He orders a salmon toastie (£8.95), a build-your-own salad (choosing 3 out of 4 options plus extra chicken for £4, totaling around £13.50), and a carrot cake (£5.95) with a cappuccino. Then he sits down to taste the food:
The salmon toastie: he says it looks like it “barely saw a radiator” (hardly toasted at all), the bottom is soggy, the cheese is claggy/congealed (hard and clumped, no cheese pull), and the filling is boring.
The salmon on its own is tasty, but the sandwich as a whole is a total letdown. “Come on, Jamie, you’ve got a cooking school right next door and they don’t know how to make a fucking toastie.”
The salad: he likes the Mediterranean elements (pasta, beetroot, peppers, kale, couscous). He notes that the chicken is juicy with crispy skin. But he complains about the price: “£13.50 for a salad at John Lewis is a fucking rip-off.”
The carrot cake: this is where he actually gets happy. “That’s good cake… quality… sponge not dry… zesty cream… well worth the money.”
In the end, he concludes that the online menu is misleading, that by 2 p.m. they’ve already run out of half the items, that the prices are steep for what you get, and that Jamie should update the website because “people aren’t stupid.” He enjoys the salad and the cake, but the toastie and the lack of stock leave a bad taste in his mouth. Classic Gary Eats: direct, sarcastic, and unafraid to say “this is shit.”